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Butchery

Taskforces ask civilians to avoid the downtown mercantile district, in light of the recently revealed cannibal cult massacre that took place in a local butchery. Prime suspects have escaped, and taskforces advise not to inhale or look in the direction of the butchery. A Pascal Daskachov original was found at the scene. 

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A week's favourite

Water Contaminated

Taskforces apologise today, after water sources local to the cave area have become contaminated. It appears that the main water supply came from the caves, within which fugitive Susej was hiding. Taskforces have reason to believe that Susej and their potential offspring have died in the chemical sterilisation of the cave system. Taskforces urge citizens not to come into contact with any contaminated water, as the chemicals used are highly lethal, poisonous, reactive, carcinogens, and flammable.
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