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Military Spending on the rise

Supported by the recent flood of duck-mine based economic boom, Corporate has made plans to extend the current military budget tenfold. He says "quality is important, and we spent a lot of money on ensuring we were giving our guys the best stuff. But this sort of thing is a balance, quality and quantity. So this increase in funding is to take what we have now, and increase it tenfold, to ensure that the public is safe from all threats. We've listened to the people, and have taken that into consideration in our deployments. Troops are stationed along the coastline along with depth charges and submerged antitank stake mines. Automated systems have been installed in the many underground tunnels to prevent any Zikoid based disturbance. Remember we are here to help." 

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Time Crimes

 Local time thieves have stolen eleven hours from public clocks. Officials have denied allegations that corporate time keeping has been affected in a recent conference. The conference was delayed for unrelated reasons. The public have been asked to refrain from referring to these events as "Time Crimes".